What I learned in the Funny Times today

I am amazed! I read in the Funny Times this morning that there is an official Law of the Natural Universe that goes like this...

Variation Law: If you change traffic lanes, the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

I always thought that was just me! So what happens if two of us change lanes into opposite lanes at the same time? Huh?

I believe I've become invisible!

Yesterday, it was the guy in the Audi who tried to drive through me; today it was a young lady in a Camry. I can see myself, yet they don't seem to know I'm there. What gives? Has this ever happened to you? It's freaky, isn't it?

What a #%*@! Morning! or Stop Scaring Me, Mister!

Whoa! You know it isn't going to be the best of days when you're forced to get into work early on a Monday morning, naturally. But wasn't that bad enough by itself? You'd think so, but you'd be mistaken. Here's my story...

I'm driving along, minding my own business in the right line. A guy in an Audi passes me, then suddenly, just inches from my front bumper, decides to drive through me to catch the exit we're just passing. Only some alert brake slamming and swerving (mine!) prevented a big smasheroo. Now obviously the guy didn't know me or he'd have known better than to count on my alert reaction at any time of the day never mind way too early on a Monday morning. Believe me, he doesn't know how lucky he was!

What really puzzles me though, is that I didn't just sneak into into his blind spot, for heavens sake, he just passed me. How could he not know I was there??? I'm sure we're all with the guy on not wanting to miss his exit, but mister, it's not worth risking life and limb, especially mine! There are times when it's worth it to go on to the next exit and come back; this was one of them.

Quit scaring people out here, will you? Thank you, sir.

One of my better photos

As a rule, photogenic is not exactly my middle name. I'm sure it's just the cameras. Anyway, this one's better than most, so I'm using it on the cover of the second edition and sharing it with you all today. Happy Holidays!

Tis the Spirit of the Season, Ho Ho Ho

It was quite a sight, on my way to work Friday morning! There were two police cruisers pulled over with one big SUV, and two officers crouched over the rear tire, obviously changing it. You know, it may not be exactly what we're paying them for, but you sure have to appreciate a kind gesture like that, don't you? Thanks guys for the extra holiday spirit!